ARRRRR, Thay Be Driving Me Nuts…

So last night, my mom and some of her younger co workers had tickets for the Pirate Dinner Adventure, which is basically Medieval Times but with pirates instead of knights, and a big ship stage surrounded by a moat instead of a dirt arena and horses. Oh, and there’s singing, so it’s basically Pirates of the Caribbean the Musical…. I have been to Medieval Times, and I have been to a few Broadway Musicals; I think a better time could be had at the local Renaissance Faire as you get to see jousting, and probably your fair share of folks running around in pirate garb – and all this with minimal Musical interference.

Stepping into the place is just like walking into the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland. Your standard New Orleans style plantation house, with pictures and statues of various pirates all around. There are little food stations for munchies like cocktail sausages, cheese, fruit, etc. Pretty cool. There is a mini show that is going on to entertain the masses before entering the main dining hall. Like Medieval Times, people are separated by color into cheering sections.

Inside the dining hall, the main stage is a ship surrounded by water, and the seating is all around. There is a musky smell of chlorinated still water, that is pretty much identical to the smell you get treated to at any amusement park water ride. We are seated and food service begins. It is pretty much what you would expect. Not bad, but not good either.

Saving grace for the night is that we get two free rounds of beer with our dinner. Oh yeah, it was lite beer too. Beggars cannot be choosers I guess. But it made the night as enjoyable as it could have been. Granted it’s cool to hang out with my mom, but then again, my mom isn’t the best drinking buddy out there. Nor are her coworkers who speak English with fairly heavy Chinese accents. At the end of the day, the enjoyment of any event is the company you keep – as the event could be the best thing since sliced bread, but suck ass because the people you went with were utter tools. Or it could be a horrendous show and utterly forgettable, but the group in attendance made it highlight of that year (e.g. Medieval Time, Schaumburg, Chicago). Regardless, alcohol definitely helps however.

Since photographs are just horrible to take in the darkly lit dining hall, I’ve resorted to using video to continue this documentation. As stated earlier, the is basically Pirates of the Caribbean the Musical, so here we have pirates singing and dancing. It isn’t all that bad; but while sitting here, I was wondering what was the turnover rate for the actors. I’m sure there is some kind of contract, and I’m sure they’re out trying to get other jobs in Hollywood. I wondered how many screen and stage actors trace their roots to shows such as these. How many of these folks tried out for American Idol, or the various other reality talent shows out there.

So they pull off the deck, and hooray, it’s pirates jumping on a trampoline. I think I liked the Man Show’s version better. But still, that little black guy can move; and probably has to show up the white pirates with his ability to trampoline higher.

Probably one of the other highlights was the pirate acrobat. Spinning and twirling in mid air by wire. Not bad looking for this distance either, at least for a circus reject.

The grand finale was a live action PVP (Pirate Vs Pirate). Where the hell are the bloody ninjas when you need them? But the choreographed fight was decent through out the show, the clang and clashes of weapons and whoosh of misses are all embedded with the music, so I didn’t catch many missed cues. It’s no actors on horses running at each other with long pointy sticks; but the men on the horses weren’t singing “In short, there’s simply not, A more congenial spot, For happily-ever-aftering than here,
In Camelot” either.

Show is now over, and the pirates sing a lovely tune as a good bye gesture. Pirates sing YMCA by the Village People?!? Ok, this has to be conclusive proof that these pirates are that of the butt kind. They’re in shape, fairly good looking, can sing, yeah – cut, print, gay.

I did enjoy the night, it was something different and I hadn’t had dinner theater in a long long time. I will have to redeem myself and the lack of participation at the Renaissance Faire in April/May…

Click here for more pictures and bigger versions of the above videos